I’ve struggled this year with Crohns, the Stelara I was on stopped working and had a bit of a flare. So I have been off and weak all year. The doctors started me on an infusion to replace the Stelara and I was due to have my 4th one first of a new script in the middle of my isolation period. Then to get kicked in the guts by this is another shit thing I need to deal with. I am scared because I don’t know the ramifications of this. But I have been preparing for this, taking every chance to mitigate the chances or issues it could cause.
It took awhile but despite all the precautions over the past two and a half years I was finally struck by the tail of this pandemic. This isn’t a story about how I tried hard to avoid it although I did, nor is it how somebody inconsiderate infected me because I got it from someone who tried harder than I to avoid it. However, myself and those close to me got blamed for ruining family celebrations because we took precautions they didn’t like. It really hurts people, I care about how they were treated by selfish individuals who saw common sense precautions as an attack on their rights or some other weird reasoning. Now I have it I feel they might try to justify themselves and double down on their inconsiderate behaviours.
Well, the precautions I took including getting double vax and ensuring I was eligible for Antiviral medication meant that yes I’ve tested positive but my experience has been significantly more mild symptoms then I would have had if I hadn’t been so careful. I am confident with all my underlying issues that had I not followed the path I did through this I would now be in the ICU struggling to breath. So this is a little story note to say to those who want to make those that care about people like me who have to rely on medical science that they can make them feel bad. You wrong, you were wrong before and are still wrong
This is important because my support network is currently also struck down by covid from a different source. This means I am struggling more than I usually do to get support and when you get so used to saying you'll be okay I don’t need help it’s hard to change that narrative. But also not being able to return the favour to my support network when they most need it feels selfish and I do not enjoy that feeling. I know this isn't a great post and haven't been many recently but it's hard to concentrate and write something worth reading.